5 Gay Parenting Myths
By Suzie White
Our core belief at Colorado Surrogacy is that everyone has the right to be a parent, however that may look for them. Building your family using a gestational carrier is just one of the options available to folks who want to become parents. We are proud to be a piece of the “becoming a family” puzzle. Our gestational surrogates carry for people from many walks of life, many locations, and in a variety of life situations. We love the way this creates such a beautiful tapestry of families.
Unfortunately, there are still people who unfairly believe that some configurations of family are not as “good” as heterosexual parents. Weird ideas get started about “what happens” to kids born to families that don’t look like what people think is “normal.” Here are 5 myths about gay parenting that we continue to see, even at as LGBTQ parenting becomes more mainstream.
Myth #1: Gay Parents Will Raise Gay Kids
While the research to date certainly doesn’t support this theory, there are people who still believe the misstatement. There is no evidence that children raised by gay parents are any more likely to be gay than children raised by straight parents. An interesting finding in the research is that children raised by gay parents tend to be more tolerant to diversity. No question that is a very positive thing.
Myth #2: Kids Need Parents Of Each Gender
Good parents are just good parents, regardless of their gender or sexual orientation. Love, strong role models, quality time and involvement in a child’s life are some of the important things in raising a child. Some believe this can only come from a man and a woman, but the acceptance of gay parents is on the rise.
Myth #3: A Surrogate Won’t Want To Carry A Child For A Gay Couple
While there are some gestational carriers who would choose not to work with a gay couple based on their personal or religious beliefs, there are many, many surrogates who are thrilled to help grow any family, whether it be with straight, gay or single parents. This shows how committed and generous surrogate mothers are to this extraordinary process. There are even many carriers who request specifically to work only with gay couples because of their belief in helping gay folks become parents. There is great and growing support for surrogacy, and support for surrogacy in the LGBTQ community, as well.
Myth #4: LGBTQ Parental Rights Are Unclear
While it’s true that there are a few states in our union still sadly interfering in gay parents’ rights, it is also true that great progress has been made in the past few years on a national level (and in many states, as well). In Colorado, same sex couples not only have the right to be married, but they are able to have both same sex parents’ names on the birth certificate when a gestational carrier gives birth to their child. That's pretty clear!
Myth #5: Gay Couples’ Relationships Aren’t As Stable As Straight Couples’ Relationships
It turns out that same sex couples who live together have the same amount of relationship stability as different sex couples who live together. And same sex couples who are married may actually enjoy more stability than their married different sex counterparts.
What really matters when you get down to it is that a child is brought into a healthy, nurturing, loving environment. This is what allows them to thrive, not whether they have two moms, one mom, two dads, one dad, or one of each.